If your gag-reflex kicks off at just the thought of performing oral sex on a partner, you're not as alone as you might think you are. Because it's arguably the most intimate you can get with a person, and it's not something you want to do if your heart's not fully in it. But that doesn't make it any less of an awkward exchange with your partner when they begin to wonder why you're not jumping at the chance of going down on them.
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When it comes to sex, there are a lot of variables to consider. What you like, what your partner likes, whether you're ready or willing to try something new, sex positivity, consent, how to spice things up. Basically, there's a lot going on when you start analyzing sex.
Over my decade-plus on the dating scene, I carried a terrible secret. Or, at least, it felt like a terrible secret. And yet, I felt just as confused and ashamed as if any of those things had been true.
Women require creativity when it comes to, well, coming: Research shows that only 30 percent of females can orgasm through penetration alone, which means you may have to use a variety of foreplay methods to give your lady the pleasure she deserves. That often includes oral sex. Spend some time kissing her lips, caressing her breastsand using finger play to stoke her sexual fires.
Here are a few reasons women may not be into giving head. Traditionally—and research finds this is still true in many modern relationships—women are often presented as more passive than men during sex, says study author Jessica Wood, a Ph. So check in with her during sex.
Sure, it's popular. But that doesn't mean you have to do it. I love receiving oral sexbut it hasn't always been that way.
I just never understand most Kenyan men. I am sick of the way some men can pretty much bank on getting head at some point during intercourse, but a woman getting some mouth action down there is something of a rarity. How can you put up with a man whose mouth has never gone below your bosom? To be in a relationship with me you would have to absolutely enjoy pleasuring me with your mouth and would have to volunteer to do it every time we get it on.
Photo via Wikimedia Commons. It's something that I don't do and that I have always tried to avoid in the past. When I was asked to write this piece, I felt like a kind of rare bird — though I'm sure I'm actually not.
Oral sex refers to oral mouth and tongue stimulation of the genitals or other areas of the body. Fellatio refers to oral stimulation of the penis; cunnilingus refers to oral stimulation of the vulva the external part of the vagina. Anilingus refers to oral stimulation of the anal opening also known as "rimming" or anal oral sex. The penis is the most sensitive at the tip, or glans, including the frenulum y-shaped areathe underside of the penis where the glans meets the shaft.